Wednesday afternoon, two high school boys were removed from their school bus after a report had been made that they were carrying loaded guns.
My 15-year old son Jake and my 11-year old daughter Sara Claire were on the bus behind the bus from which the offenders were removed. They watched the administrators search the bus and physically remove the boys. Jake came home that afternoon and told me the story, as he always does when one of his former tormentors faces disciplinary action. Turns out one of the boys in question was the same boy who harassed and bullied Jake mercilessly last year, during the 8th grade. So, it was no surprise to me that this kid was in trouble again. We just wondered what he'd done this time.
Thursday afternoon, Sara Claire came home and told me that there was a rumor going around the school that someone had brought a loaded gun onto the high school campus. It didn't take us long to put two and two together.
Friday morning, while getting dressed for work, I was listening to the Bob and Sheri Show on our local radio station, 107.3 the Q, and I heard a local news brief about two Harris County High School boys facing criminal charges and possible expulsion for bringing loaded guns to school. Despite our previous assumptions, my blood ran cold and the taste of metal filled my mouth. I resisted the urge to fly out of the house and rush after the school bus that had just picked up my kids. Instead, I walked calmly and deliberately into the living room where Brad was still laying down. He'd been staying at the house for the last two weeks, offering his invaluable service in helping the household and family during my transition from Stay-At-Home Mom to Working-Outside-the-Home Mom.
I told him what I'd just heard and we sat, stunned, in the half-light of my living room in the early morning. The fear was immediate and palpable. We weren't quite sure what to do because, well, there wasn't anything to do. The danger had passed and we'd not even known it when it was actually present. We could rest assured that the school would be a safe place, at least that day, and there was really nothing to do except try not to obsess over what MIGHT have happened...how bad it could have been.
Because it could have been really bad.
There is no doubt in my mind that if this boy had arrived at school with the intent to take lives and do damage, my kid would have been a clear and obvious target. Although Jake and the boy had not had any interaction during this new school year, last year, the boy was aggressive and violent towards Jake, and was actually suspended for harassing Jake by repeatedly hitting him in the back of the head as he passed him in the hallway. We had to deal with the administrators at the middle school on many occasions and, ultimately, it seems that our diligence paid off, as the middle school has clearly amped up it's anti-bullying program this year.
Unfortunately, while the middle school administration got the right idea, it was been made very clear that we are still living in Good Ol' Boy country when the Harris County Sheriff, Mike Jolley (up for re-election this year) was quoted as saying, in explanation for the incident, that while it was a serious matter, he was sure it was just a cased of "boys being boys."
Right.
Boys. Being boys.
Because boys typically disregard all authority and have no respect for rules or other people or the sanctity of life. Because boys, as a whole, should be expected to carry loaded weapons to school, abuse their classmates and bully their peers into submission. Boys *will* be boys after all.
I know a lot about boys. But I know a lot about bullies, too, and what I know for a fact is that being a boy does not equal being a bully and being a menace to society. I think such attitudes do a serious disservice to our children, both those who are targets and those who may develop into the aggressors.
Brad sent an email to the only local news channel covering the story, after watching the interview with Sheriff Jolley. Subsequently, an interview has been requested to expose the "other side of the story," as told from the perspective of the victims or potential victims. I have not spoken directly with the reporter yet, but I have discussed it with Jake and the rest of the family, and Jake has given me his permission to speak publicly about our experience with the school system's treatment of bullies, the misinformed mentality of the small town law enforcement officials and the serious nature of the epidemic of bullying that is running rampantly through our school systems across the country.
I'll make the call on Monday and talk to the reporter. Thankfully, after all of the ordeals last year, I'm pretty well-versed, not only on our family's personal experience, but with the subjects of peer interaction, social development and bullying, as well. It is safe to say that I'm about to climb up onto the soap box; I've got something to say.
Oh, and I forgot how dramatically different it is being a working (outside of the home) mom, after three years of being at home with my kids. Very, very different...and hard.
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